Wednesday, October 15, 2014

the HOLE

My husband and I met almost 14 years ago.  We fell in love and as time passed, we gained weight together.  Looking back, we had gained weight by giving up on exerise and our health...just like that.  We found love, what else did we need? Funny how that happens so quickly after working SO hard.  I had worked HARD and threw it all away...
going back a bit- For the first two years that we dated, I refused to eat out.  Our dates were at the movies, the local sports bar or hanging out with mutual friends because I would NOT enter a restaurant.  AT ALL.  
How sad was that?
You see, I was always one extreme or the other, it seemed like.  If I was heavy and not "dieting", I was binging on fattening food and indulging eery chance I'd get.  If I was "dieting" and losing weight then it was no restaurants, no seasonings, no carbs, NO NOTHING.  I had NO clue how to find was all or nothing for me.  It was all I knew.  EVEN after studying health and nutrition, my mind was more powerful than the knowledge of what was fact.  I knew what was right and what was balanced but it seemed like those rules would never apply for me...I was different.  Those book and professors couldn't possibly understand wha it was like to struggle with emotional eating and weight problems.  NO WAY.  
So As time passed, I became most couples do and the weight started slowly creeping back.  THE first restaurant we went to with friends was okay, I managed to order my "diet food " and move on...but the next?  NOT SO PRETTY.  I binged.  I kept eating and eatng...and eating.  And he did too (most men do!) and that made me feel okay with it, ya know?  I mean we were already in love, he knew all of me but he didn't know this.  I hadn't shown him the compulsive eater I could be, but now he knew and he accepted it?  Yay.  
After that it became the norm.  Friday nights were for Mexican food together.  We'd eat enough chips and queso to feed 20 people and then fajitas piled high with cheese and sour cream...and don't forget the beer!  
I guess you get the idea of where things went from there?  I gained quite a bit of weight-but kept it somewhat in control and I'd go through spurts.  I'd workout for a while, eat and cook healthy but seemed like one bad meal would trigger a total loss of control for MONTHS...
So today while at boot camp, I was speaking to a friend about frustrations of losing weight and gaining it back...and then some.  A story I know all too well.  I did it MANY times but each time it left me feeling the same...empty and like a failure.  Ugh.  She expressed that she felt the same.  "Look how far I had come years ago, losing all that weight and now I'm right back where I started, only 20lbs heavier".  Been there?  I know her and I are not alone.  Even if it's not regarding weight loss but thinking of a time in your life when you were a competitive athlete, a runner, when you were at your healthiest....same feeling of failure, right?Any feeling of "we aren't where we used to be" would fit this description.  
She had a very valid point so I had to quickly think about how I deal with that same thought of failure and the BIG mountain I have to climb all over again...I had to think about why when we have set backs in life, do we not totally give up on ourselves.  

I told her for me it was like a hole.  

The hole I used to dig for myself. That hole I'd create each time I'd gain the weight I had worked so hard to lose.  Each time I was working out and was on a roll, but that little bump sent me back where I had started meant that hole grew deeper and it felt like the larger the hole, the more I'd want to crawl inside it.  

I'd live in that hole, in secret mostly.  It was where I felt safe. It was the hole I cried in, where I wrapped my emotions into my foods and where I THOUGHT about how badly I wanted to change but would never actually change.  It was where I could be true with myself.  While in public, I'd put on the front-the "it's okay that I'm unhealthy, nobody is perfect right?"
As I started to slowly climb out of that hole, I started to see and feel a new way of life.  I was still ME but a different, much happier, full of life ME.  It felt amazing...

**So back to my husband and I and our Friday night binges together...
I found myself sinking back into that hole. Little by little I lost sight of what I wanted so badly. 

It was when I realized that my "bigger" clothes weren't quite so BIG that I started fighting back again...and slowly.
Instead of feeling sorry for myself for allowing myself to take two steps back, I said okay it's time for TWO STEPS FORWARD!  
I realize that it feels better to slowly climb out of the hole than to sink and hide in it. Make sense?  
So instead of looking back on where I WAS I think about not letting that hole bury me.  It was going to get worse, wasn't it?  I mean we can't eat unhealthy, never exercise or take care of ourselves and just expect to have perfect health right? That hole would have only grown bigger and deeper...pulling me down with it.  
By not allowing my health to hide me and take over my life, I proved to myself that I can and will fight back...a million times again! 
I think as people with a goal in mind, weight loss or whatever...if it seems like that mountain is TOO big, we just cilmb down.  But instead we should focus on climbing out of the hole we've created.  We are meant to make mistakes-it's how we learn and help others.  BUT we are not meant to QUIT.  Not meant to GIVE UP or STOP TRYING.  

and it's also very important to surround yourself with those people that want you happy and healthy.  DO NOT surround yoursself with those that are only out for themselves...they will not lift you up when you need them most.  Trust me.  
What are your thoughts on climbing out of the hole rather than climbing the mountain?  

Monday, October 13, 2014

WDW reflection

Walt Disney World...
what a fantastic place where we find a way to have a great time while making memories with one another that will last a lifetime...nothing quite like it!  Here's just a few pictures...

While it's always an incredible vacation and we seem to have it all figured out, or so we think :)
I couldn't help but look around and feel worried for the health in our country.  
It upset me so much that I had to remember the raw emotions so that I was able to come home and post about reflect on what I witnessed while there.
Of course I DO NOT JUDGE.  I was there, I struggle day to day to keep myself in check but do I worry?  Absolutely.  I can't help but feel compassion and to immediately want to help BUT HOW?

As we walked from park to park, enjoying rides and shows I was troubled by the amount of motorized scooters seen throughout the parks.  They were EVERYWHERE.  
Not from broken bones or handicaps but from obesity.  Yes.  
One family really struck a cord with me and I can't seem to remove them from my mind.  They were waiting in line, parents both in scooters-mid-40's and obese.  Their children were probably 10-14 years old, two daughters.  They passed around a Krispy Kreme box FULL of donuts and shared them while waiting in line.  Meaning they ate the entire box as a family.  
Do I judge that family?  Absolutely not.  Will some families?  Yes but that's not the issue here.  The trouble I have with this is that the children were already obese, parents are both incapable of walking throughout the park, yet they all choose to "nourish" their bodies with junk.
Now I made sure to think about this situation and would it be different if it were a family that was not physically overweight consuming donuts in the park? For me, NO...I'd feel the exact same way because our insides determine our health.  Our heart, our arteries, bones and muscles...NOT our physical appearance. Will obesity decrease our health?  Yes but it does not mean that over a dozen donuts for a family of four is okay...that is NEVER okay.  
Will people pass judgement differently on a non-overweight family?  Probably.  
And that is SAD to me as well.  

We should focus on feeling healthy, nourishing our bodies with GOOD FOR YOU, NUTRITIOUS FOODS and we should focus on doing the same for the people that we love most.  Not just ourselves, but everyone around us.  We should make an effort to impact as many lives as possible!  EVERY DAY!
And I guess what hurts SO much is that no matter how badly I wanted to help that family, I couldn't.  No matter how badly I want to help people that I love-family, friends...everyone.  
I can't unless they truly WANT IT.  It is something I cannot accept and I struggle with it daily.
I WANT TO HELP EVERYONE.  I feel like I can care a million times over but if they don't want it, I can't help.  THAT makes it unbearable.  I've been there, in that place of helplessness and fear and I wouldn't wish it on ANYONE.  EVER. 

  When will it end?  When will enough be enough?  These parents clearly are feeling the side effects that come with obesity, yet they are allowing their children to follow in their footsteps.  Ugh.  It breaks my heart for those teen girls.  
Had they all just given up, lost hope and just decided THIS was their life and they'd live modifying life's special moments and medicating through food?  

I'm not perfect, never will be and am learning as the days go by.  But I do know living life overweight is NOT fun.  Not one day of it is fun.  The waking up, getting dressed, struggling to catch my breath while climbing stairs, consuming food to temporarily coat my own frustrations, feeling the "looks and glares", the shopping, the house chores, the getting in and out of my car...
it was ALL WORK.  It was exhausting to simply BE ME. 
How sad is that?
Sad for anyone but extremely sad for a child.  A child who did not ask for 6 donuts for breakfast but ate them because it was the "choice" that day.  I cry as I type this because how do we "fix" it?  How can we make it better and educate families to better care for themselves and their children?

I'm at a loss for words and that RARELY happens...thoughts? 

Monday, September 29, 2014

on a "quest" for yummy food ideas?

Then you've come to the right place...

I'll be honest, I'm picky when it comes to healthy foods.  I mean, of course I eat MANY foods that I wouldn't have eaten in the past but if I try something and I don't like it, it's tough for me to give things a second these chips arrived on my doorstep and I have heard how great they taste and with 21 g of protein and 5 carbs, I had to see for myself.  
My husband and I decided to pop open a bag before sharing it with my local workout group...
and we LOVED them!  Keep in mind, he and I are huge chip fans.  We used to take out 3-4 baskets of chips at the local Mexican restaurant on a Friday night :( 
so when we approve, they must be tasty!  
PACKED with 21g of protein per bag, they are available in 
BBQ, Cheddar and Sour Cream and Sea Salt.  

I love the Sea Salt and the Cheddar and Sour Cream, 
but many of my members of Move It Mommas prefer the BBQ!  

The only reason BBQ was my least favorite is that it has a very bold, spicy taste but from their feedback, if you like regular BBQ chips, you'll love these just as much! That's a win-win!!
All of these would taste great with my Greek ranch dip!  I wouldn't recommend eating them daily because our bodies need balance and different foods but for on the go, these are a GREAT snack option.  A healthy alternative to chips...I'm all ears, right?! 

The crunch is what gets me!  GREAT crunch to these chips.  
A huge bonus when trying to find a healthy "chip" which is hard to find until now.  
Some love sweets and candy...not me.  I'm a chip-aholic so while I love these "chips", I will still practice balance and only eat them on occasion.  
These would be great to pack along to a gathering with friends. 
You can snack and munch while everyone else is loading up on high fat/high calorie chips and dips :) Shhhh

See for yourself on their website, including nutrition facts for each flavor:
Regular: $2.99/bag but are on sale for $2.39/bag!  DEAL!
After talking with my boot campers, we think it might be smarter to buy in bulk to save on costs, but less than $20/box isn't too bad of a deal either.  
Plus check your local supplement stores-they should be carrying these Quest Chips SOON!

Excuse the post-workout hair...we worked HARD today which left me eating the rest of our sample bag of Sea Salt Protein Chips!  See, I told ya they were good!  
Have you heard of these?  Would you try them?  

Weekend breakfast tends to be my favorite meal time.  I have time to be creative in the kitchen since there's less rushing around and this past weekend was no different!  I found Lactaid- lactose-free cottage cheese and it's delicious.  I mixed 1/2 c with fresh blueberries and grapes and enjoyed it with a slice of whole wheat toast topped with 2 egg whites that were pan-sauteed with coconut oil spray!  Simple and satisfying!  
FOCUS ON BALANCING YOUR MEALS! Protein, carbohydrate/starch, and fruits

Oatmeal variations!
I just love a yummy bowl of oatmeal to start my day.  It's quick, easy and effortless...but most importantly it fuels you throughout your morning-leaving you fuller, longer!
Always with a sprinkle of cinnamon, of course 

BE CREATIVE with your kids!  I spoke about this last week but it's so true.  If your children see FUN with their healthy foods, they are more likely to enjoy these foods later in life.  It's about moderation so while I did bake some not-so-healthy chocolate chip cookies for them last week we chose to not simply enjoy the cookie by itself and decided to use it as a "topping" to their banana and PB after dinner snack.  They told me it was DELICIOUS which makes me smile.  
Banana slice, 1 tbs PB and some crumbled chocolate chip cookie.  There was 1/3 of a cookie on each banana so very little cookie...just enough!

THIS picture makes me smile...
Not only because that's my son running at his first soccer game but because he's enjoying BEING ACTIVE.  Yes he's 5 and just enjoys "playing" but playing is BEING ACTIVE!  As adults we tend to focus on having to exercise and that being WORK but don't forget that being active can mean ANY type of activity.  BEING ACTIVE IS MOVEMENT!  Smile, play with your kids outside, get involved and HAVE FUN!  Movement is what our heart, muscles and joints crave.  They want to move and feel good.  We can give them that by fueling with the proper nutrition and adding MOVEMENT to our daily routine.  Healthy, happy MOVEMENT!  Not going from the couch to the kitchen or the car to your desk...MOVING at the park or playground, with a workout group, a running club...JUST GET MOVING!  

When I see my boys active AND having fun it makes me smile and feel fulfilled that I've done my job as a mother each day.  I am keeping them active and feeding them nutritious foods while helping them understand how their body works and how to practice balance and portion control.  It is ALWAYS important, no matter our age or size!  


Wednesday, September 24, 2014

find a way...

What are priorities?

Is it laundry? Cleaning? Work? Children? after school activities and sports? 
Watching your favorite TV shows? Having lunch with a friend?


maintaining a healthy weight?  Improving your quality of life? Lowering your blood pressure and/or cholesterol?  Lowering your risk of diabetes and heart disease? 
Feeling better and having more energy to take on the world? 

While feeling good and losing weight is a HUGE priority for me and the women that I help, what goes on in the inside is MOST important.  Depression? Clogged arteries? Fluid retention? 
110% my children and husband are a priority in my life 
BUT taking care of my body and my health is a priority as well.  So making my health a priority still puts my kids first but now they'll have a better Mom.  A more active, fun, adventurous Mom.
A mom that FEELS GOOD and will in turn, make my husband, children and the people around me...feel good.  I can't think of a better priority than that, can YOU?

The harsh truth is that we're ALL busy.  Some of us have different forms of BUSY but it is all equally important to each of us.  
We talked after boot camp today, which always gets my brain spinning...
IF we choose to make our health a priority then it just IS.
There's no okay maybe I'll try, it just happens.

If our work schedule is out of control and there aren't enough hours in the day then we should REALLY concentrate on the things we put into our body.  Not fueling on sodas and chocolate but foods that are GOOD FOR US.  Portions that are controlled and foods that give us energy and make us feel good, not the ones that leave us filled with guilt and buttons bulging.  
Then on the days we aren't quite as "busy" then we can get moving...walk with our family, bike ride through our neighborhood or play a game of baseball with our kids.
For those that feel overwhelmed with our crazy schedules, give yourself credit when you can.  If you set a goal to get moving twice a week and drink less soft drinks AND you accomplish that goal each week-CELEBRATE YOU CHOOSING TO MAKE YOUR HEALTH A PRIORITY!!!

If it's laundry or lunch with friends...GREAT!  The laundry WILL happen when needed as will the exercise and eating right.  It will all happen if we make it ALL a priority.  The lunch with friends can happen as well, AFTER taking care of business, being the priority of our health.  
After you've worked out and then grabbed a healthy lunch with friends, 

How can we justify these other "to do's" as a priority but not OUR HEALTH?  
Yea it sounds a little different when I put it that way, doesn't it?

When our priorities change, WE CHANGE!  It's incredible how that happens :) 
And we don't have to take important things away, 
we just have to add our HEALTH to that list of daily to-do's! 
These women have become part of my priority!
My health and their health

To see the smiles on their faces after working hard to accomplish the goal, to hear them proudly say they are fitting into smaller jeans, they are losing pounds and inches, that they like what they see when they look into a mirror, that their husband said they are looking fantastic, their co-workers are inspired by their weight loss and/or leaner appearance, to hear them say they speak about our group to their families and loved ones, to hear them say that they are INSPIRED by our group moves me most of the time to tears

They have obligations, busy schedules, sick children, hurt feet, achy muscles, laundry that must be done, jobs that they must report to daily, kids that they have to cook for, tend to, haul to sporting events...

BUT they have decided to add ANOTHER PRIORITY to their list...

post-workout PARFAIT!
plain Greek yogurt, 1/2 of a crumbled Kashi pumpkin spice flax granola bar 
and some fresh raspberries!
Ohhhh deliciousness!  

My Move It Momma GROOVEBOOK arrived yesterday and it made me smile SO big!
a look back on our first year as the MIM's!
Loved seeing all of these beautiful faces in one book!

If you haven't checked out GROOVEBOOK, you should!
It's $2.99/month for a 100 picture album delivered straight to you with the theme of your choice!
I keep my family memories in neat order this way by grouping them with "Summer 2014" "DisneyWorld 2014", etc!  It's also a great way to have a keepsake of all of your phone photos!  I upload straight from my iPhone and they are ready to go!  I choose the photos I want and BOOM! once a month it is delivered with a groovy, new cover!  There is also a place to tear the photo in case you need a quick family pic on the go! Printed on photo paper so good quality as well!
I'm not plugging GROOVEBOOK for a campaign or a paid advertisement, 
I'm just sharing my love for a great product/deal!

Monday, September 22, 2014

don't waste it.

Our time and energy is valuable.  
Don't waste it.
I spent hours in the gym working toward something that never came.  I mean, of course my cardiovascular health was improving and it was getting the blood flowing and heart rate up and was MUCH better than sitting on the couch eating and watching TV BUT it could have been so much more.  I now understand MY BODY.  While what I learned in college and in these past years has taught me so much, I didn't quite understand MY body which caused me to waste valuable time.  

Instead of wasting it, CHOOSE BALANCE.
It's far easier to accomplish your goals when things go hand in hand.  
The body, mind and stomach.  

Sounds silly but the truth is realistically 20% is the hard work that you put into the gym, the workouts and the sweat!  The toughest for some of us are the other hours in the day.  The 80% that is found through our foods that we eat, water that we drink and how we take care of ourselves on the inside.  It's SO powerful and once we find the balance between the two, 
the magic will begin to take place.  
We can make that magic happen together, as a community with the right tools, support and DETERMINATION!  

Yes, YOU have to want it. Nobody can force us to change and if and when they do, the change will NOT's just not possible unless we feel it deep within ourselves.

We are all different.  We hold different triggers, different obstacles and different excuses so let's start by immediately stopping the excuses!  100%.  If we want something badly enough, we will stop at nothing to make it reality.  
We make time to brush our teeth, so why on Earth can't we make time to exercise?  
Identify your triggers and "excuses" and as you write them down, 
cross them out at the same time!
Simply STOP making them and the results will find you soon enough!
If you keep a whole bundle of excuses then you aren't quite ready to change, you obviously enjoy carrying around that baggage for now. 
If you justify those excuses, your mind will start to believe that you truly CANNOT CHANGE and then your heart will follow, along with those unhealthy behaviors and then it effects our quality of life, our family and our children...

This picture was ME, wasting time! 

I was working out 6-7 times a week but never changing...same workouts every week! 
My foods weren't balanced but they could've been MUCH worse so I can't beat myself up over that.
IF our body finds repetition with our diet & our workouts then it gets comfortable-never changing or pushing itself because it EXPECTS what's coming! STOP WASTING TIME and make each calorie consumed good for you and every calorie burned-worth it! The balancing act within YOU will make sense over time. It will become like second nature...and the changing will come and slowly transform your life and your health. You will find that all aspects of your life will improve and you'll FEEL healthy! Ahhhh then you can take a deep breath knowing you stopped wasting away and started grabbing life and living it! Every breath takes on new meaning, we find ourselves nourishing properly and our bodies are now responding through tough workouts that challenge us both physically & mentally! ITS WORTH IT SO SEARCH UNTIL YOU FIND IT WITHIN YOU!!! 


We want a sweet treat, sometimes we opt for frozen yogurt but making a healthy snack as a family can be just as fun!  These are banana slices topped with peanut butter and a chocolate graham cracker.  SO easy and fun to make!  The kids enjoyed stacking the bananas and then eating their creation!  Yum!  Our kids want to be creative and get involved...LET THEM!

Lasagna!  Whew a tough one for me because I'm Italian...what's not to love about pasta, 
cheese and more pasta right?!  
Since I grew up eating 2-3 oversized portions of this stuff, I had to find a way to carry on the Italian tradition without all of the guilt, fat, high calories and UNbalanced action happening with this meal so I did!  

Move It Momma Turkey Lasagna: 
You'll Need:
1lb. 99% lean ground turkey
1lb Jenni-O turkey breakfast sausage
brown rice lasagna noodles-cooked al dente
low fat ricotta OR cottage cheese
low sodium diced tomatoes with juice (3 small cans or 1 large)

Brown meats with onion and garlic( I add LOTS of garlic for added flavor), add tomato with the juices and allow to simmer with a little pepper.  Boil pasta according to directions but usually 5-7 minutes making sure to not over cook the pasta noodles.  Layer small amount meat mixture, small spoonfuls of cheese, as shown above ( a little goes a long way with ricotta) and layer noodles.  Repeat until dish is full!  Bake at 350 until bubbly!  Serve with steamed string beans and watch as your family tells you how incredibly amazing you are :)  

This morning I wasn't feeling oatmeal so I toasted a slice of sprouted whole wheat bread, topped it with Greek cream cheese for added protein and some fresh raspberries!  YUM!  Effortless and delicious!  Followed by a few glasses of water and I was ready for my workouts!  

Tuesday, September 16, 2014


In order to change and transform your life, I believe we must grab hold of the impulse.

That split second decision to get our mind in control of our body.  
I was always so hooked on that immediate high I'd get from indulging in that "bad" food.  
My body would react hours later, feeling awful and bloated.  I'd lack energy to do anything positive or productive so I'd allow those impulses to grab hold once again.  
I remember vividly the way my body would feel after a meal that wasn't nourishing to my body.  A friend of mine sent a text reminding me of those feelings because she too, deals with this impulsive behavior at times.  I think we all have at one time or another?
I also remember having "issues" with going to the bathroom...almost every day.  My body was showing me it wasn't feeling nourished and healthy yet I continued to sabotage myself over and over again, only to end up feeling worse each time.  WHY?
Well if I had the answers, I think I'd be able to conquer the world but all I can do is promise that from learned experiences, it's a battle worth fighting within yourself.  

I can remember being in my bedroom after a meal with friends and I felt SICK.  I'd lay in bed disgusted thinking about the endless baskets of chips and queso I had consumed along with 5-6 tortillas with very little else.  It was sometimes a joke to see who could make themselves sick on the food that night.  What were we thinking?  That's miserable and so unhealthy.
It was like a comfort and each of us could count on one another...through food.  

We make "impulse buys" at the store but can always return it.
If we make our food choices based upon impulse, there's no returning it but we can use it as a learning experience and move forward.  We can engage our minds and think more clearly when it comes to the foods that we choose to eat.  
It's always a choice.  ALWAYS.  

Exercise is WORK.  It's tough and our body feels drained when it's finished.  To me it is no comparison to the rest of our day.  The times where temptations, impulses and emotions wrap into our daily lives.  It's tough to battle brownies in the workroom, homemade fried chicken with family and a weekend pizza and wing party...right?

Honestly, as I attend functions I try to remind myself of how my body feels AFTER the impulsive behavior.  
Do I feel healthy?  Am I full of energy? NO and NO.
So instead I'll pass on those options at the party and make healthy decisions before and after.  
For me it was easy to NOT EAT at parties when I was heavy...this would keep from drawing attention to the chubby girl devouring the appetizers, so I'd self-destruct when I'd walk in the door.  
That seemed to work...deprivation and then over consumption when I'd get home.   

BUT sadly this option is even more dangerous to our health.
A little indulgence is okay and then we balance the rest of our day accordingly.  So I had to wrap my mind around the fact that going to a function where I CHOOSE to not have pizza, only means I'll fuel properly and feel better later.  Where in my past I'd feel sorry for myself for not being "allowed" to have pizza so when I get home I'll eat two bags of chips and some Oreo's.
Our minds are powerful!  SO VERY POWERFUL
Our decisions with our food need to be made by thinking before we act.  Not on impulses.
This is so tough for many of us but overcoming this is possible.

All of this coming from the queen of "just one more bite" so if I can do it, there should be no stopping any of YOU!

Any of you struggle with these impulse food decisions?
How do you overcome?

Wednesday, September 10, 2014


Isn't that so true?
Fear holds us back from so much in our lives.  
No matter the fear, we are always set free once we conquer what we are afraid of.  

Finding the picture on the left was yet another WOW moment for me.
Although I dreaded pictures of myself in years passed, I now use them as stepping stones on my journey.  Each pictures is a reminder of how I felt in my body and mind at that time.  And while I openly admit my issues with my body, I am working on it every day.  We all should.  

We cannot be afraid to explore the unknown.  
We can no longer be afraid to stop using the word "diet" 
and start living like we know that we should.  
It's human nature to want things NOW but is it because we fear what's on the other side? 
If we reach a goal do we fear that we may never reach another? 
Are we afraid of what the future holds when we stop being SATISFIED with life as we know it?

That picture on the left was ME running 5-6 days a week, eating Smart Ones and Lean Cuisines, smaller portions of cookies, crackers and baked chips.  Consuming some fruits and veggies, limited protein and far too little fiber.  I also allowed myself one soda a day 
but still drank plenty of water.  

For some of us that is structured and "healthy" right?  Maybe not.  
THAT moment on my journey was huge for me because while I look back to that picture on the left, I see a heavier Marissa but then I saw a much fitter, healthier Marissa.  And I was.  
I was no longer that fast food junkie that hit up every quick meal on the corner and I was MOVING.  I would put 90% effort into my workouts but they NEVER changed.  
After doing those repetitive runs outdoors, I'd come home and fire up a meal in the microwave, grab a bag of baked chips and sit on the couch.  Whew I was tired!  
And looking back to 2001, of course I was healthier now.  I had lost a substantial amount of weight and was learning to maintain where I was...which was the end of my journey right?  
I can be SATISFIED with that?

Studying exercise, health and nutrition in college, you would think I would graduate knowing all of the answers, would set a plan for myself and the sky was the limit BUT after graduation came the real world-get a job, get married and have babies :) ALL beautiful and some of the best moments of my life that I wouldn't trade for anything but I think along the way through life we get SATISFIED with how things are...and that goes for all aspects of our lives, wouldn't you agree?

I was gestational diabetic with both of my pregnancies and while I could control it mostly with diet, with my first son I had to take insulin shots.  Eeek.  I remember the doctor telling me "sometimes this is an early sign of what can come later in life if we don't change" and I remember thinking to myself, "Are you really talking to me?  Seriously...I workout 6 days a week, have a degree in this stuff AND I've lost 76lbs obviously have it wrong".

But she was right.
I was focused on calories not balance and I still had the mindset that if I exercise, I get to EAT!
Those micro-meals would be 300-400 calories, super high sodium and carbohydrate with little protein and I'd top it off with some baked chips.  Where's the balance in that?
I was lacking fiber and protein, as most women do and this was causing major bowel issues (sorry, but it's true) and it was keeping me at what was still a bit overweight.  
I didn't think so at the time because I had come so far, 
but look how much further we can go?  
How much MORE we can do?  

It took years but I think I've got the whole BALANCE thing figured out.  I'd say I'm quite different than the girl on the how I've changed.  And I find myself frustrated because I feel like I can share what I've learned, knowing I made plenty of mistakes, and share them with the ladies in my group BUT sometimes if we are SATISFIED with the way things are, then we aren't able to let others in.  We aren't able to receive help because we've lost hope in ourselves. 
We are now SATISFIED with tired, achy, defeated. 
and SATISFIED with the fear of trying.  
SATISFIED with taking medicine for this health problem, only to create new health problems. 

We have good days and bad.
Don't become SATISFIED with where you are now.  Instead, get ready to go further...
accomplish more, set new goals, stop being okay with comfortable! 

I see my pictures and think, "I never thought in a million years that I'd be where I am today...
just think where I'll be tomorrow...and the next" 

If it's 5lbs or 500lbs to lose, muscle to gain or strength to find- stop being SATISFIED!

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